February 16, 2012
Eventually I will merge the two, but for now, I am writing pretty frequently here:
...and not really at all on this ol' blog you are looking at right now. Click on over, won't you?
December 02, 2011
The morning after it had been super-windy
it was still super-windy
and standing on my balcony
we saw three doves flying around.
One of them was all-white,
two of them were white with black tails.
I thought the black-tailed doves were bad omens
but when we got in my car,
“This Is How We Do It” was playing on 92.3,
followed by “I Can’t Go For That,”
Logic dictates that each one of those songs
cancelled out one black-tailed dove,
and we drove off into the day
ahead by one all-white dove.
November 28, 2011
Some people act like they’ve only read the middle third of a book about the rebellious hard-living artist they so clearly idolize - not the ending, where they’re dead, or the beginning, where they’re talented.
November 23, 2011
It’s fun to hear rapper’s early works, to hear them spout aliases for themselves that would go on to not really catch on and end up jettisoned by the second album.
Mine would sound like this:
“WHATUP, it’s DC, AKA Mr. Sad For No Reason Sometimes, AKA The Pope Of Straight Gettin’ A Plastic Spoon Out Of A Box Of Plastic Cutlery And Usin’ It To Eat Like One Scoop Of Peanut Butter To Give Him The Base Amount Of Nourishment Necessary To Perform The Mental Task Of Thinking About What To Actually Get For Lunch, And Then Putting That Spoon In The Sink Instead Of Throwin’ It Away, yaheard?”
I think the first one might actually stick.
Reading, Like, One Book: Failing To Make Uninteresting People Interesting For Over 500 Years!
November 21, 2011
The other night we sat on the couch of the house where she’s cat-sitting and drank wine and watched The Wire while she mended a hole in the pocket of some pants I got at Old Navy.
It was like a heaven where you still needed pants.
October 25, 2011
I'm an asshole.
Also, this is 90% of my online interactions.
Also, it’s true.
Immutable law of science: If you say “Not to be that guy” and proceed to be that guy, you’re still that guy.
October 20, 2011
If you are in a mob movie and someone says “Let me ask you something” to you, enjoy your last few moments with an un-punched face.
October 17, 2011
I just had the quickest most pleasant experience at the DMV.
It was like a million 1980’s stand-up comedians cried out in pain and were suddenly silenced.
October 12, 2011
I’m just gonna give this my entire life, and if it doesn’t work out by the time I’m dead, I’ll do something else.
“People don’t say each other’s first names when they’re talking to them in real life the way they do in movies, Denise!”
